Friday, April 3, 2009

Death

We missed the moment. We were eating at a restaurant when we got the call.. I am not quite sure what possessed us to decide, as we sat with our dad anticipating his death, “ you know what, I could really go for a hamburger right now”. But, we did.

We finished up and headed back to the hospital. Walking into the room everyone was quietly looking at my father lying serenely under the blanket. I stepped up close to him and said “OK, SO DAD, I LOVE YOU, ENJOY YOUR JOURNEY, WE WILL BE FINE”

“What are you doing? Why are you shouting?” my brother asked, sounding both curious and annoyed at the same time.

I had just finished reading an article suggesting that when a person dies it can take up to a day for the soul to leave, and in fact they can still hear. I am not really sure how they could know that, or if the dying part made them hard of hearing, but I thought, just in case...

Even when expected, someone dying still comes as a surprise. It’s always sad – even my dad, who had lived a full life and left behind a wonderful legacy. It’s always hard.

Like it or not, death is inevitable. It often makes no sense, and happens far too soon. Fearing death is an odd thing. Like a being at a great party, I don’t want to leave. I haven’t much concern about what’s on the other side, I believe it will be much the same as this, only gas will be cheaper, no disease or guns, and no mosquitoes.

At those moments when I am grieving the loss of someone, it is also a reminder to me to live life to the full. Being present and making the most of now is my resolve. Death isn’t something to be scared of, but not living life is.

Here’s a tip. If I do die, and you’re around when it happens? Save saying crappy things about me for about 24 hours – I just may be listening.

2 comments:

  1. Funny, and good; and, yes, saying goodbye is always hard, whether you're leaving or staying.

    Thanks for this. I'll say only nice things.

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  2. Save it or say it- a guy said that it's all going to be revealed- in love though, I think.

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